Earth to aanu

I don’t believe we can be satisfied.

Photo by Matthew Wiebe on Unsplash

Happiness is such a temporary thing if you let your Joy be dependent on it. The moment you stop feeling that joy and rush, you return to where you started in a pit of despair or just standing at its edge.

What makes us happy is the fulfillment of our desires, whether we are aware of such wants or not. However, we are moved to joy and probably tears when we feel safe in our hopes.

If you never wanted money, getting some would only lead to a nod of acknowledgement and not a leap of Joy. So, the saying that we can choose to be happy is absolutely true until we forget to keep making that choice.

Personally, I get so wrapped up in my triumph or glee that I forget when I was in misery over an issue. So when the rush of the glee is over, I crash back to the floor with new aspirations and desires. Maybe that’s one of the beauties of humanity.

The constant want for something.

How nice would it be just to be satisfied with everything? To take a break from the ups and downs. To come to that point where you say, I don’t need anything anymore; I have found my perfect place in the world.

Unfortunately, I have found out that even the most satisfied people still have a knack for something more. Maybe they aspire to be more satisfied or have the instinct to wish for more—even the simplest things like touch.

The ability to keep wanting is human itself. The moment you stop wanting, the world leaves you behind, and you cease to exist. So, that pull to wish, hope, and dream is all humane. If we sit too long at a spot, we get used to the position. So, the option to remain there or start to seek a table presents itself.

So, what do you want more of? Be honest with yourself. What have you given the power to control your Joy? Money, marriage, ambitions, faith, position, family, or anything that brings you fulfillment.

I am not dismissing your source of joy, whether long-term or short-term. But get this: You are not in control of your happiness, but you are in control of whatever is in control of your happiness.

Whatever you desire can spoil or fix your mood at any time of the day, but the only thing I can assure you have control over is how you spin it to prolong your joy.

But to what limit do we want to prolong our joy? Joy, happiness, glee, everything related, isn’t exactly good in large proportion.

Everything needs balance now and then. It’s like when we cry when we are happy. There are different theories, scientifically or whatever proven, but my favourite is the need for balance.

Those tears are not random. They help emotional stability. People who cry from happiness when overwhelmed can recover better from the original feeling that caused them to cry. “Research” suggests that we experience intense emotions that become unmanageable and overwhelming — even if the feelings in question are joy, delight, or gratitude — we cry to release these emotions and begin calming down immediately. Some sort of experts also believe crying reflects feelings that are difficult to express or comprehend.

I think that’s absolutely beautiful.

Considering all this, I would like us to acknowledge our triggers. What drives your joy? How much control do they have over your happiness?

And lastly, is it worth it? Can you justify why this source should drive your sense of fulfilment?

I can justify my faith. I understand that I am seeking a deeper relationship with the creator for peace and hope amidst the chaos, and when the time is right, I can be in a state where my need for wanting more doesn’t exist.

Also, I can justify my love and need to speak with my family. They are my number one supporters and my first community. I learnt a version of myself, the first community I belonged to. Whether as Aanu, Nunu, Aanuoluwa, or Daddy’s angel — whatever the label, my initial sense of self sprouted from home. So, I understand the rush I feel when Someone comes to visit or when somebody calls for the third time in a day.

I have many other sources of joy, some delusional, some unattainable, and some not justifiable, but they exist with time.

As I have grown, my interests have evolved, and my priorities have shifted, leaving me with a vast possibility of what can drive me in the future based on the circumstances. An example of that is money and ambitions.

Unfortunately and fortunately, some of us do not have the luxury of that driving passion or dream for which we can drop everything. So, we have to learn what we want to do. Personally, I have a goal to be successful, comfortable and at peace. In other words, I want to pile up money and achievements without having my happiness based on that. So, everything I do is guided toward that goal in mind. So, I try to be joyful inspite of and not because of.

Until now, I don’t believe I’ve fully reached that stage, but I’m moving in that direction. I’m making an effort to appreciate what I have and discover happiness beyond my possessions. The love for success is a slippery path; You can have all the money and achievements in the world. But, if you are grateful for nothing, you will never see life improve. It’s like everything falls into the black hole of things we take for granted.

After all is said and done, the end of desire is finally attaining an ultimate need that would reduce all other needs to nothing. So, Even in eliminating want, there is a desire and need to want to want nothing.

As I do not believe in satisfaction, I believe we can be satisfied by finding what we truly want, justifying it and never losing focus on its purpose in our lives. It’s there to guide us and not control us.


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